Episode 75: Mind Over Matter: What is Mental Health? with Robert Biggs Part 2

00;00;09;02 – 00;00;54;10
Kelly Parbs
Welcome back to back with OnTopic with Empathia- I’m your host, Kelly Parbs. Today we continue our conversation with Robert Biggs. In part one, we talked about how wellness is more than just the absence of illness and why so many people are feeling overwhelmed despite all the increased attention on wellness. In part two, we’ll explore what actually supports wellness in a sustainable way, from the connection between physical and emotional health to simple, repeatable practices that help regulate stress and build resilience over time. Let’s get back to the conversation. You know, the other thing you said about dogs is that they play hard and they sleep hard. And I think if we’re talking about wellness, we have to talk about sleep.

00;00;54;15 – 00;04;44;18
Robert Biggs
100%. And I can say, thankfully, from- from my perspective, I’ve actually gone under a… I don’t want to say, ‘renaissance’ is a bit of an aggressive term, but I’ve focused on my sleep health a lot more within the past, we’ll say six months, and it has drastically improved almost every aspect of my life. I can- I cannot stress that enough. So previously I would you know, I have three young kids and when they’re all finally asleep by like 9, 9:30, I kind of reside in myself. It’s like I made decisions and I did things for everyone else throughout the day. You know, between work, between the kids, the house or my dog, you know, all these things. I just want to have a sit down and have a minute where I can just do my own thing. And it’s. And it’s only an hour. Perhaps it’s only, you know, maybe something a little bit more. But I make that effort. And when I do, I end up staying it up until, I don’t know. 10:30, 11 sometimes. And regardless of the time that I go to bed, I love I love my youngest, but she will wake up almost on the nose 6:30 every morning. That is her time. That’s when she wakes up. Despite her best effort, she could run and stay up late. She could stay up till midnight. She’s going to wake up at 6:30 a.m.. Her circadian rhythm is so in tune to that time period. So I realized that this was starting to cause a detriment because there was most nights I was only getting like six hours of good sleep, you know, maybe a little bit more, maybe a little bit less. And I realized that I started to feel groggy. I started to feel kind of back on, on. I was shorter with my conversations and I wasn’t as engaging. I wasn’t the person that I felt that I really should be. Let me put it that way. And I decided that, you know what? I still was exercising. I didn’t really have an issue falling asleep and getting decent sleep, but I was like, you know what? Let me give my body a little bit more time. So when the kids went to bed- 9, 9:30, something like that, I would make a very big effort to be in bed before, like around the same time and be asleep, you know, within a half hour within that time frame. And once I started doing that, I found myself. I started waking up around 6:30 anyway with my youngest. But I found that not only did I sleep better, but man, I felt like more energetic. I had this better, brighter perspective on every single day, and it’s wild to think that it was just that little change. Like it was just an hour. Just one hour of a change of going to bed a little bit earlier and working on that, you know, a little bit sooner than staying up until 11 or 11:30. And it’s even going so as far within the past couple of months that when I go to bed at 9 and 9:30, I’ve been waking up earlier at like six and I’ve actually woken up, got myself dressed. I’ve still had plenty of energy. I would actually, I’ve been going to the gym, you know, being at the gym by like 6:30 until like 7, 7:30 and working out and then it’s like, now I’m starting the day really well. Like I’ve already got my movement in, I’ve already got my exercise in. I feel a lot better. I feel like I can move more, I can feel like I have a brighter perspective on a lot of things, and it’s so crazy to think that it was just that little change and drastically, almost overnight. No pun intended. My mental wellness, like I felt mentally so much better. And it’s and it’s crazy to think that it was just such a small little change. Just a little change.

00;04;44;19 – 00;05;48;04
Kelly Parbs
A little change. And there’s there’s where the lesson is right in, in that for all of us, for our listeners to be aware of what it is that we need and be open to the idea that a small change might be transformational, like getting an extra hour of sleep has been for you. So we’ve talked about the importance of movement, the importance of sunlight being out in the elements, the importance of sleep. And by the way, just quickly, I’d love to recommend that people read information from Andrew Huberman. He has a lot of information on sleep and dopamine regulation, and I’ve found his information to be very inspiring and helped me make a commitment to being very, very intentional about my sleep. So definitely a recommendation for our listeners in terms of improving your wellness. What about nutrition? I think we we can’t talk about wellness without talking about nutrition.

00;05;48;06 – 00;10;14;23
Robert Biggs
Oh, man. Now, now you’ve opened up the can. Now it’s now now we’re now we’re going to have a conversation. So as if we weren’t having the conversation just now freely anyway, nutrition is it is such a highly touched and highly debated point of contact. And I think the reason that that is true is because I don’t always believe that there is any one right way as far as approaching nutrition when it comes to mental wellness and just overall wellness in general. Because let’s be serious, is that, you know, the saying is you are what you eat. And that does ring true. And I would say starting off the conversation of nutrition is I do have to say I’m not a licensed nutritionist, I’m not a licensed dietitian. So don’t take like, what he’s. Oh, well, Ben said this. No, none of that. I’ll just speak very anecdotally from my own experience and my thoughts being here in the field. I like to open up with that, and it’s just a habit that I did. I was taught very early on is from my physical education background. They’re all like, you’re not a nutritionist and don’t tell anyone what to eat. I was like, okay, that’s simple enough. So when I look at nutrition and especially the connection to overall mood, I kind of actually garnered experience and garnered perspective from what I’ve seen with my kids. Now, I know that you have heard this in some. Everyone’s heard this in some way. It’s like, oh, don’t let your kids eat too much sugar, or they’re going to get a sugar rush, and then they’re going to crash and they’re going to be cranky. There’s truth to that. There really is. And I bring it up as something that we are embraced on almost a daily basis, and it’s very hard to get away from is the amount of sugar that, that, that we run into, the amount of sugar that is in almost everything. Truth be told, even what’s it my my wife has been having, like these little electro like, pack electrolyte packet things, you know, sweetening a drink, giving her, you know, a little bit more hydration, things that she likes. And that’s something that she, she does on her own. And I even look at that and it’s like that right there in this one little packet has like 10 to 15g of sugar, a standard can of soda, just one soda has almost more than your daily recommended value of sugar within a single. And that’s just one can of soda. I can drink a can of soda in like under a minute flat. Bam! Done. And it’s wild to think that it is so prevalent in everything that we do, and the almost inverse effect that it has on our mood, it’s like, yeah, you might enjoy it, it might taste great. But overall, I feel that the more sugar that you have, the more the harder it is for you to regulate your emotions, the harder it is for you to regulate your own mental well-being. So and of course, it’s well documented in a number of different places. The amount of sugar that you have isn’t detrimental to your health. I mean, what’s a type two diabetes is a very real thing, and it’s usually due to excessive amounts of sugar and then insulin resistance. But looking at all of that, there’s a good evidence to show that sugar is not, as is possibly one of the most sharpest will say, mood affecting substances that we have like available to us on any given day. I mean, if you go to- what’s it, even Dunkin Donuts? We have a lot of Dunkin Donuts around here. You go to a Dunkin Donuts and they’re like just even one of, like, a small coffee with a one pump of, like, mocha. I like mocha. That’s my flavor. It’s like. It’s like 30g of sugar. It is wild. The amount that is, is everywhere in our society. So I say all that I bring in the long win is because I found anecdotally, in my experience, is that the more sugar that is added into your diet, the harder it is for you to balance your own mood. And it’s because you’re kind of pulling it to two different sides, like you want to be mentally well, you want to be able to balance your emotions better, but then it’s also hard if you’ve had, you know, 2 or 3 sodas within one day, your body is trying to. But it’s, it’s it’s difficult.

00;10;14;23 – 00;11;53;17
Kelly Parbs
So absolutely. And again, we’re you know, we’re speaking to that awareness of little changes that we can make in any one of these areas. We’re not necessarily saying change all of them, but but which one might you need to change. Might you need to go from two cans of soda a day to to one and hopefully then down to none. And I agree with you. We can see that very, very clearly in children when they’ve had too much sugar, we can see their behavior change. And I think it changes your sleep as well. And it can kind of throw you into a downward spiral. So like you said, we’ve all heard it. We know it. But knowing it isn’t enough, taking action, making little small goals around, you know, am I going to change my behaviors around my sugar intake, something that I think has been getting a lot more attention lately, also is the connection between our gut and our brain and how that might influence things like mood and stress and emotional regulation, something I’ve just been trying to learn more about. We tend to think of emotions as happening just in our mind, but there’s actually a lot of communication happening between the brain and the body and and the digestive system. And even for those of us who aren’t experts in this, like me or maybe you, it raises an interesting question how much of how we feel is influenced by what’s physically happening inside our body. So I highly encourage our listeners to learn more about the gut brain connection and how that relates to our emotions as well.

00;11;53;20 – 00;13;10;15
Robert Biggs
Oh, absolutely. I mean, I do think that it goes back to the statement of, you know, you are what you eat and the amount of good bacteria that you have as compared to the amount of bad bacteria that you have. Because, again, you know, part of being human, where we have this idea, it’s like, oh, well, you know, I don’t want to have any bacteria. Bacteria causes illnesses. And it’s like, yeah, some do, but some also help regulate the rest of your body. And that also goes into a larger factor of if we’re looking at like your gut microbiome, we’re also looking at the aspects of okay, is this gut bacteria that I have, allowing me to digest the food that I’m eating and get all the nutrients that I need. Because again, when you’re nutrient deficient, you’re not meeting any of those particular goals, which again, highly recommend speaking to like nutritionist. They’ll be able to help you figure out what those there’s a lot of dedicated information. I am not I am not that professional. Who’s going to tell you what to do, what to do. But I will say that there is a lot of good information that that states that the good bacteria helps you with your absorption of that, that good nutrients is good vitamins and minerals, and those cascade and affect the rest of your body.

00;13;10;18 – 00;13;11;06
Kelly Parbs
Exactly.

00;13;11;07 – 00;14;27;17
Robert Biggs
I mean, if we’re even talking like hormone regulation, the amount of hormones that you have that are influencing the rest of your activities, it’s drastic. You look at even like a common thing that we that I’ve heard a number of places is fatigue. They talk about, oh, man, I’m just I’m just tired all the time. Like I’m eating right, I’m exercising, I’m sleeping right. And and you look at it, it’s like, oh, you know what? Perhaps this person does not have enough iron in their body. And that’s drastically important for for the, the countering the fatigue. And that could be a target. That could be a goal. And again, a lead into registered dietitian nutritionist, someone who specializes in that. But then from there you’re able to have more. Again, we’re talking about tools that you have at your disposal to make meaningful change. And that could be one of them is that, you know, maybe you’re missing a nutrient, maybe you’re missing a vitamin on a daily basis. Maybe a multivitamin is the right way for you. There’s so much into this. And and of course, how your body feels also affects that idea of mental wellness, right? Like if you feel healthy, like the rest of my body feels healthy mentally, you’re going to perceive yourself as healthy and your body is going to make the rest of that true.

00;14;27;20 – 00;15;21;23
Kelly Parbs
Absolutely. And I think the point here is that we know that resilient people know and use the resources that are available to them. And perhaps a resource that you have available to you is to speak with the nutritionist about things that maybe you haven’t thought of. Maybe you’re that person who is always feeling fatigued and and you need to explore that. We know that stress impacts digestion and vice versa. That gut feeling is real. Stress can disrupt digestion and digestive issues can increase feelings of anxiety and irritability. And and so what I’m saying is maybe you need to look at another option for your wellness and think about what has worked for you, but also think about what resources are available to you that maybe you haven’t tried yet. Be open to that.

00;15;21;24 – 00;15;22;20
Robert Biggs
Absolutely.

00;15;22;23 – 00;15;37;02
Kelly Parbs
So as we start winding down here, Robert, I want to talk about like, what are some strategies to apply to our wellness in our day to day life that that we can have as, as takeaways?

00;15;37;04 – 00;16;03;26
Robert Biggs
So I love that question, I really do. I think that there’s there’s a lot that we can do. And I think that’s also honing it down into actionable items. Because again, if you just say, hey, I’m looking for wellness and I you know what? Let me do this right now. Let me just actually I want to see this because I’m out of computer. ‘How To Be Well’… 4.8 million hits on Google as far as how to be well!

00;16;04;01 – 00;16;05;02
Kelly Parbs
Wow!

00;16;05;04 – 00;20;43;19
Robert Biggs
That is- it is! There’s so much out there! And I think that that paints a wonderful picture of kind of where we’re at. So in my experience, in my recommendation for the listeners out there is something that I want you guys to be able to kind of walk away is like, okay, that is a piece that I can actually do in actionable piece. My first objective for you, what I would suggest that you would try is to write down something, a wellness goal that you would like to do, and that could be as simple as, I want to be able to walk a mile. And to some that may seem something very small, to others that may actually be a very big deal. Sure, I want to walk a mile or I want to learn how to meditate. I want to change this aspect. I want to reach this particular angle, and from there you can frame it into smaller even, break it down even further. Say that we’re going with the walk one mile as your goal. Okay, how about we start out with work walking for a minute continuously? Okay, cool. We were able to do that. No problem. Two minutes three minutes. And then we work and build from there. A lot of what this conversation has talked about has been looking at smaller, incremental changes to influence a larger picture. And I think that’s where the initial goal would be, like, let’s go ahead and write down what we want to accomplish, what we want to change. Okay. Let’s even frame it in the sense I want to be better mentally. Okay. Let’s look at the key aspects that we had during this conversation. Sleeping better, exercising, you know, limiting sugar or finding better eating habits, things like that. One, two and three. Okay. Let’s look at those three to influence the rest of our body or influence the rest of our mind. Okay, well, I’m already walking. I take my dog for a walk every single day. Exercise. You got something going on there? Sleeping. I probably stay up later than I should. I like to the term doom scroll and look at my phone for an extra 20 30 minutes before I go to bed. Okay, maybe that’s an actionable thing. So instead of doing 20 30 minutes, I’m going to limit myself to ten, turn off the phone, and then try to get to sleep a little bit earlier. That’s an actionable goal. And then we can start seeing a different change. Instead of me going to Dunkin Donuts and get my extra extra, which that is the thing I actually one of my first jobs was working at Dunkin Donuts. Getting an extra extra at Dunkin Donuts is possibly not the best way to start my day. How about I just start out with a small coffee and just have it made the normal way? It may not seem like it’s a big change, but your body is going to know the difference. Your body is going to be able to pick up and say, okay, so instead of this large amount of sugar, we’re having a lot less and you still get your coffee, you still get a little bit, but it’s an incremental change. Everyone likes to go from point A to point B, but they miss point A. A1, A2, A3, A4, a5 before they can get to point B, so look at the smaller individual change to influence the larger one. Now that’s one way that you can you can start with. That’s one objective that you can do is look at those one, two, three, eat, sleep or exercise. Find something there that can a small change that would be able to improve your day to day. The second thing, and this is something that that it’s going to take some time. But look into the idea of emotional regulation. Look into practicing emotional regulation. And it takes. It does take a bit of time. Truthfully, I was it was very difficult for myself. But taking a moment to instead of a knee jerk reacting to what my body is feeling. Oh, the guy cut me off. I’m going to yell. Maybe yelling isn’t the best way. Maybe yelling isn’t the best outlet. Yeah, it’s frustrating, but taking a moment to realize again that person may not have the best day, they may not be having a good day, or they’re having a worse day than you. Take a moment and say things could be worse. And and it’s funny is just that simple saying, well, reframe a lot of it and it’ll help you on this idea of emotional regulation, because we’re so used to all those those quick reactions, those quick, I’m going to get furious or this is going to set my emotional level up to a ten. Now, whether it’s happy, whether it’s sad, whether it’s anxious, things like that. Just take a minute, take a breath and then say, you know, it could be worse.

00;20;43;21 – 00;21;01;05
Kelly Parbs
Absolutely. I think that’s good advice. And if that’s really difficult for you to do, many people listening here have an employee assistance program available to them where they can call and say, I could use a coach, or I could use a counselor to help me with with these small goals.

00;21;01;06 – 00;22;14;02
Robert Biggs
Absolutely. And it’s more depending. And it isn’t something that is always actionable for everyone, because I do know that some people do not have access to a mental coach or a mental coach. These outside resources of people that they can speak to. So I would also really emphasize the fact that use what tools you have at your disposal. So it may not necessarily be a direct coach, a person that you can actually talk to, but it might be like a small webinar series or, you know, a some kind of like habit changing aspect that’s a part of your medical insurance and insurances offer quite a bit of things. He just got to know how to ask. You just got to know where to ask and who to speak to. Your HR representatives for your company usually are a great starting point and be like, hey, I’m looking for like, you know, any kind of like, what else does our insurance offer? Does it offer these coaching sessions with a real person, or does it offer, you know, an e-learning series, an online learning series to learn these habits? That could definitely influence. And it’s something small. Usually these little sessions take 5 to 10 minutes, and it’s something that you could do on your lunch break.

00;22;14;02 – 00;23;00;10
Kelly Parbs
And and I just want to add that a lot of us get these new employee packets when we get a job, and we’re so overwhelmed with learning the new job, we never really go through all of that information. I would encourage all of our listeners to dig into what are your benefits? What do you have available to you? Seek that information out, because I think almost everyone will be surprised at the level of benefits that are available to them, including the possibility of having an employee assistance program and the wealth of benefits that are available through that type of benefit. And again, we know that resilient people, they know their resources, they seek them out and they use them. And and that would certainly be something that I would encourage.

00;23;00;15 – 00;23;27;25
Robert Biggs
Absolutely. And I think you put it perfectly. There’s so much information available at any given time, and especially when you’re starting out in a new role and you know, you want to make sure that you’re doing your job correctly. And that’s usually where a lot of the focus goes. And it should, of course, a lot of the focus should go there. But don’t forget to take some time for yourself. It’s so easy to get wrapped up in everything else that you’ve got to sometimes realize you’re important to, you know, like.

00;23;27;27 – 00;23;30;03
Kelly Parbs
Yep, self-care is not selfish.

00;23;30;09 – 00;23;33;21
Robert Biggs
Oh, I like that. That’s a good saying! That’s a very good saying.

00;23;33;23 – 00;24;43;04
Kelly Parbs
This conversation reminds us that wellness isn’t something we arrive at. It’s something we practice. And often it’s built through small, consistent actions rather than big dramatic changes. Robert’s perspective highlights the importance of awareness, regulation, and intention, especially in a world that constantly pulls us into go mode without giving us space to recover. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, stretched thin, or disconnected, start small. Pay attention to your body. Slow your breathing. Take a moment to reset before moving to the next thing. These aren’t insignificant actions. They’re how we begin to restore balance. Remember this wellness isn’t about doing more. It’s about doing what matters more consistently. Thank you so much for joining us today. To hear more episodes of On Topic with Empathia, visit www.Empathia.com. Follow us, @Empathia, and subscribe so you don’t miss new conversations. I’m Kelly Parbs. Thanks for listening.